I grew up in the Mid West near Lake Erie. It was humid, lush and green. It's all I'd ever seen and all I'd ever known.
When I was young, my family decided to go on a trip that would take us into the Appalachian Mountains. These were enchanting times. I was actually going to see something I had never seen before -- mountains!
I was practically quivering with excitement. Mountains were something I'd always wanted to see and my family was always raving about how beautiful the Appalachian Mountains, in particular, were.
We got into the car and drove. I waited impatiently to see the mountains, my eyes pasted to the window. I was afraid to blink. We drove into rolling hills, and more rolling hills and more rolling hills.
I asked when we would get to the mountains. To my utter horror, I was informed we were in the mountains.
I looked around. They were covered, completely covered in trees! I couldn't see the mountain at all! Nothing but vegetation all around! These were mountains?????? What!???
All I could see were a bunch of trees! I didn't want to see trees! I saw trees every day of my life! They were everywhere! There was nothing new, or novel about a bunch of trees!
Where were the rocks? Where were the crags and rills? All covered by massive vegetation! NOOOOOOOooooooOOOOOOOoooooo!!!!!!!!!!
When I was nearly 20 I moved to Utah. I got off the plane, and besides being instantly in love with the total lack of humidity (this is a topic for another day) I could see something that made my heart leap in joy.
Mountains! With rocks! Gobs of rocks, tons of rocks, gazillions of rocks! And not a tree on them! (I was wrong about this, I was later to find out, there are trees on them, you just have to get closer to know that.)
Now here, here were mountains! The real deal! Rugged, huge, and majestic, rising up from the valley floor in rocky wonder!
Imagine my excitement when my family came to Utah for a visit a couple years later and I could show them these amazing, beautiful, real, rocky mountains!
'Look!' I said, 'You can see the mountains! Aren't they amazing?'
'They're ugly,' they said, 'Where are the trees?'
That was when I realized I'd been switched at birth.
